I have thought about this topic quite a bit lately, for many reasons. I don't even know where to begin because its so personal to me. I have always known that you must forgive everyone. Many years ago my ex brother in law, during a summer visit for my niece, kept my niece. He was not my favorite person because of the way he treated my sister. Terri is a very kind hearted person. But Bobby kept Cindy and forced my mom to pay huge legal bills to get her back, which we finally did. I couldn't understand why the Lord would allow him to do that, until one day driving I was listening to a primary tape in the car about Prayer and I realized that even IF I prayed to have her here, (if) he prayed for her to stay there than who would Heavenly Father listen to. SO as much as I hated what Bobby was doing to my mother and sister and even my family (I was traveling back and forth to Austin alot) I would need to forgive him. I can honestly say that I did. It doesn't mean that we are best buds but I don't hope he gets run over or anything like that. Forgiveness is a hard thing for some.
A few months ago another niece did something that was legally and morally wrong to Brett on more than one occasion, without going into detail, it has caused some hard feelings amongst cousins. I don't agree with what she did, and if I were to do anything like that at work I would lose my job, with out question and no chance to say I'm sorry or try to make amends. Brett and I have discussed this several times and he said that he has forgiven her, even though they have not spoken in months. Which I understand, you can forgive someone, even if the opportunity does not present it self to speak to or be around that person. Even if you had the opportunity to be around them, you may not want to put yourself out there to be hurt again. Just before Brett and Brittany moved back here another niece told Brett (I'm paraphrasing) "You out of all people should understand forgiveness, since you need to be forgiven by everyone". Not only was that hurtful, but totally uncalled for. What makes her think that SHE needs to forgive Brett or anyone for that matter to say "Brett I forgive you for driving and for Meridith dying." When Meridith and Brett were in Mexico and they were in the car accident, it was just that an ACCIDENT. I guess for me I know that it was the Lord's plan, does it mean I don't miss her OF Course I DO. When Meridith died Grandma Wade (who is the most wonderful woman I know) gave us a book by Spencer W Kimball "Tragedy or DESTINY?" One of the best books I have read. I helped me to understand many things. Rachel has a really hard time with Meridith's death, she works on it but still struggles with Brett being the one driving. I have on may occasions thought about Meridith's last year here. In about April 2005 Meridith and Kyndall were in a car accident. A car T-boned her on Boat Club Road by the Race Track gas station, she had her window down which allowed her not to be hurt otherwise she could have suffered severe head trauma. Kyndall was with her and they both were fine. After moving to Idaho, Cherie and Meridith drove down to Provo to see some friends while driving Meridith had a blow out, the tire completely fell apart she pulled over and they were fine, but Cherie was with her. Not her time yet. In march driving back from Colorado she and Lon, my nephew, and his fiance almost hit a deer. Not their time. I have thought about this along with forgiveness because people sometimes are mean about what they say and how they say it. Maybe they think that they need justification to feel that way. How sad it is, what is forgiveness, how can we live our life here and not forgive and then expect the Lord to forgive us? He can't and maybe won't. I know that through the atonement we all can be forgiven no matter what...but we must do our part and forgive too. President Uchtdorf gave a talk entitle Point of Safe Return. He makes this statement Are There Points of No Return in Our Lives?
Satan, “the father of all lies” (2 Nephi 2:18), “the father of contention” (3 Nephi 11:29), “the author of all sin” (Helaman 6:30), and the “enemy unto God” (Moroni 7:12), uses the forces of evil to convince us that this concept applies whenever we have sinned. The scriptures call him the “accuser” because he wants us to feel that we are beyond forgiveness (see Revelation 12:10). Satan wants us to think that when we have sinned we have gone past a “point of no return”—that it is too late to change our course. In our beautiful but also troubled world, it is a sad reality that this attitude is the source of great sorrow, grief, and distress to families, marriages, and individual lives.
Satan tries to counterfeit the work of God, and by doing this he may deceive many. To make us lose hope, feel miserable like himself, and believe that we are beyond forgiveness, Satan might even misuse words from the scriptures that emphasize the justice of God, in order to imply that there is no mercy. Satan is the father of all contention, and contention causes such discord. I have notice if you are mad at someone, anything and everything that person does frustrates you even more. I am not in the least perfect, I make mistakes all the time. I know that I have hurt and frustrated many people during my life time. Some I know about and try to fix those, some I may not know about, I may not be able to fix that. What I do know is that we are required to forgive everyone and holding grudges and being mean is not the way to do it. We certainly want Heavenly Father to be forgiving of us. Christ came here and paid the ultimate price, he didn't say I am going to forgive only the people I like or just a few people, when he suffered, he suffered for ALL of us. He paid the ultimate price, his life so that we might return and live with them again. And our families. I want to live my life so that I can return to live with them again. I want to have the blessings promised to me. Does that mean I am perfect, No but I am trying the best I can. Will I make mistakes YES, but I can and will repent, because Christ paid the way for me.