April 27,2011 Lots of random thoughts

Life seems to be speeding by. It seems that I can't keep up. I have had so many thoughts on my mind and yet am not quite sure what to say. This year in our Young Single Adult ward in the I attended the Sunday school that was on family history. I started thinking alot about my family. Who am I most like and since I have both sets of my grandparents deceased what do they think? Are they proud of the person I have become. I have done anything that they would be embarrassed about or even disappointed about? I feel this need to have my grandparents sealed together with my 2 aunts that have passed away. I talked with my grandmother's sister. Her name is Janet, it was very interesting to talk to her. I am so glad that years ago when I got a phone number of one of her nieces that I kept it. She gave me some insight on my grandmother, even though she was quite a bit younger than her.
I have 4 siblings that I don't really even know. My father remarried and they had a son and then a set of triplets, 2 boys and a girl. I have spoken to 2 of them several times since I found them about 18 months ago. I am glad that we have begun a relationship it is exciting to get to know them better.
We are preparing for Young Women's camp again and we are excited about how it is coming together. Our theme is "Its a jungle out there" and we are using the Young Women's theme of the 13th article of faith as a guide. Each ward is a animal with the stake leaders being the zebras. I am so thankful to have served as in the Stake Young Women's presidency for so long. We have a great presidency. I have learned so very much for the other sisters that I have served with. Their example has strengthened my testimony so very much. There are times that I struggle with life in general, just like everyone, but the gospel is what gives me the strength and courage to continue. I want to return to live with my family, as crazy as it may be.
We had a lesson on honesty in Relief Society, Jessica who taught the lesson did a great job. I think about Rick's description of a lie. Saying something with the intent to deceive. When you think about it that way it gives a different perspective. Do you says something about someone else that somewhat true not not entirely? Do we says things that make us look good and someone else look bad? And if so why? Is it because we don't like that person, or ourselves.
What do we really think Christ has done for us, and we really want to be the cause of his suffering? I had someone tell me something about a person, they feel that this person like drama. You know family drama to keep it going or at least to hear all the family gossip. I had to stop and think, do I contribute to that pot stirring. I had to think about what I might say about someone else. Would I say that to them, you know interestingly enough I would. I guess I prefer for others to be honest to me that to sugar coat it. I did have a young women who is now in the singles ward tell me recently that she enjoyed it when I spoke. That I would tell them honestly and share my personal stories and feelings. I am thankful that I knew that I had been honest with them at all times.
I know that this is very random but I figured that I better write down some of my thoughts while they are still there. I wish I had a journal of any of my relatives so that I could read of their feelings and struggles. OK I know that I am getting older so some of the things that we have been told to do all along is now making sense to me.